It's a fact: New York City and New Year's Eve seem to go hand in hand.  At least for people that don't live here.  Another fact is that a large majority of New Yorkers opt to peace out, choosing to ring in their New Year in a more fabulous location (Miami, St. Barths, Bahamas, Aspen, etc)...God knows Manhattan will be here, with considerably less tourists, on their return.  NY1 reports today that their poll numbers reveal what we already could have assumed.  Of the New Yorker's actually staying here for New Years, 80% of you will choose to stay home (and out of the 20% that go somewhere only 2% will take part of the festivities in Times' Square).  This, once again, confirms to us that New Yorkers are the smartest people around.  For everyone else out there, you have a shitload of options to choose from.  Our inbox has been packed since November with invites from everyone from the Strategic Group to the Bloc Group, to some guy named David Shapiro throwing a party on a boat.  Jesus Christ, do people like to promote!   It's sensory overload and we fear that it is often times wasted on the very people that wouldn't be caught dead in a NYC club on NYE, let alone ringing it in next to Ryan Seacrest at TenJune, or Johnny Drama (Kevin Dillon) at some place called Spotlight.  (How much do you think these people are getting paid to make THESE gigs worthwhile ones? ...we're guessing not enough).  Just for fun, we will present you with just a small percentage of the thousands of option that await you and your $130-all-you-can-drink-platinum VIP ticket:

-Join the Euros at Pink Elephant at their usual 27th street location, as well as at the Tom Beach Hotel's La Plage in St. Barths.

-Join Ryan Seacrest and hundreds of wanna be idols at TenJune.

-There's always the chance of getting fondled at Cipriani's.

-Kid Rock will be shitfaced for sure at the Hotel Gansevoort.

-1Oak is already irrelevant, but New Years may be the perfect time to check out their new gold wall, it's One of A Kind we hear.

-The underaged Richie Rich's will be will be popping bottles (as well as collars) at good old Bar Mart's.

-Upstairs, the "secret club where Leo gets in fights" is no longer a secret as the fights will be now started by followers of the blocgroup.

-There will be parties at Tavern on the Green, Amalia, Stereo, and even the "club formally known as Crobar"....The Grand, Azza, every club in Chelsea and 27th street, and of course all over Miami (if we get ONE MORE email about the event at the Raleigh Hotel in Miami Beach we may never be able to hear about Samantha Rosen again without throwing up!).  So in case you are interested in how much money you will be saving tonight, here's a sampling of the invites:

“You know not to talk to mummy when she is sales shopping."  Heard by the Post at Sak's Fifth Avenue store the day after Christmas, and undoubtedly all across the world, as after-christmas sales are set to be at record high numbers this year to make up for one of the worst retail seasons seen since 2002.  "Black Friday" aka the day after Thanksgiving has routinely been know for the time of year when millions of Americans crowd stores all across the country to snag up post-Thanksgiving day deals.  This year, it will be the post-Christmas sale-shopping frenzy that will be remembered, at least that's what many retail analyst and store owners are hoping for.  Maybe we are just FINALLY catching on to the tradition that much of the world has for years celebrated: Boxing Day.  Especially celebrated by our British, Australian, and Canadian neighbors, Boxing day is a public holiday and is the biggest sales period of their retail cycle.  Here, it is common to see mark downs up to 75% on Christmas supplies, as stores are eager to get rid of the now-irrelevant "junk", but now you can expect to see those kinds of MAJOR markdowns on the relevant stuff too, like 19-year-old Jessica Goodman did when she went to Saks and scored a $1,380 pair of crocodile-leather Giuseppe Zanotti high heels for $150 (not so junky).  So, while you are going in to stock up on your Christmas wrapping paper supply for next year, plan on browsing for deals on whatever Santa forgot to leave you under the tree.

Merry Christmas!  (English)

Merry Christmas Mates! (Australian)

¡Feliz Navidad! (Spanish)

Sung Tan Chuk Ha! (Korean)

Mo'adim Lesimkha! (Hebrew)

Suk Sun Wan Christ Mas! (Thai)

Prejeme Vam Vesele Vanoce! (Bohemian/Czech)

Feliz Natal! (Portugese)

Nollaig Shona Dhuit! (Irish)

Kung His Hsin Nien bing Chu Shen Tan! (Chinese Mandarin)

Natale hilare et Annum Faustum! (Latin)

Glædelig Jul! (Danish)

Vrolijk Kerstfeest! (Dutch)

Joyeux Noël ! (French)

???? ????????????! (Greek)

Fröhliche Weihnachten! (German)

Shenoraavor Nor Dari yev! (Armenian)

And Happy Hannukah and Kwanzaa too!

[Photo from news.co.au]

Apparantly workers at shopping centers in Australia are just realizing that Santa is scary. Westaff, the company that supplies hundreds of santas across Australia has been asked to "tone it down" because of the terror that some kids are experiencing when coming into contact with the big red jolly man. They have, specifically required that no Santa will be allowed to exclaim "Ho, Ho, Ho", a phrase that is particularly traumatic for the kids to hear because it is so unfamiliar to them. Instead, they can utter "Ha, Ha, Ha" which the they believe will be better recepted. Newsflash: Santa is scary. Always has been and always will be. Changing what he says does NOT change the face that there is a fat old man covered in fur who everyone is coaxing junior to sit on and suck up to...changing what jolly St. Nick says is not going to change this. And secondly, who the hell hasn't been scared by a Santa at one point or another...or a clown, or a giant Barney, or the Easter Bunny, or the Wiggles, or any other giant character that adults get into to try and manipulate children into enjoying themselves. It is a part of growing up, adds some hair to your skin, and is not going to end any time soon. As "grownups" we just can't help ourselves, we want to play dress up too and use "it's for the kids" as an excuse for this silly behavior. Our advice to the Santa managers in Australia: scary santas are the least of your problems, so let them do their thing, because you're going to need to save all your manpower when those Wiggles characters come to town.

[Photo from Fabsugar]

We love love love Catherine Malandrino....which is why we were pretty excited when we came across her "Tips for Holiday Dressing" at Fabsugar. Some highlights:

How can you dress for a holiday party without looking like every other festive girl in the room?Never wear black, be daring and wear a BOLD color. Always wear heels.

What are holiday dressing “do's” and “don’ts?”
Holiday Do’s: be sensual, wear textures from feathers to palettes, and mix it with light fabrics such as tulle, chiffon and organza. Always prefer a dress. Holiday Don’ts: no sneakers, no black, and no jeans, never go casual!

What’s a good dress up alternative for girls who don’t like to wear dresses or get all fancied up?
A good dress alternative is mini shorts or Bermuda shorts.

Numerous reports have proven over and over again that sex is healthy for you (yes, even if it's with yourself). This week, the ever conservative FoxNews decided to step outside of their comfort zone a bit with an article titled "Sex Your Way to Better Health: A Dozen Reasons Why You Should Have Sex Tonight." It was some of the best work they've done. This New Year's, why not make a resolution that's good for your health, and one that you might actually KEEP. Sex is good for:

Weight loss and control: 200 calories in 30 minutes of sex! um hello sign us up for a double session.

Pain management: what better way to cure your post-holiday blues.

Stress relief: by increasing your levels of oxytocin NATURALLY, so you can ween off that Paxil in no time.

Immune booster: because we've been sick one too many times this year

Sex also helps your heart by lowering cholesterol, will help you look younger by promoting the hormone DHEA, will help regulate your cycle (for women), and loads of other things...including increased self esteem (well, that may depend on the circumstances). Go get 'em tigers.

We came across something very disturbing in today's Metro.  In an article titled "A Soldier's Suicide: Did He Have to Die?" we read about the story of soldier Jason Scheuerman.  Jason took his own life in Iraq after numerous displays of suicidal characteristics and behaviors.  What was more horrifying was this statistic, imbedded halfway down in the article:

"At least 152 U.S. troops have taken their own lives in Iraq and Afghanistan since the two wars started, contributing to the Army's highest suicide rate in 26 years of keeping track."

This is so, so sad.  Not only are we loosing thousands of troops to the enemy (whoever that may be at the time), we are loosing hundreds of sons and daughters to despair.  And it doesn't end when they return home.  America is suffering an epidemic of suicides among traumatized army veterans.

"More American military veterans have been committing suicide than US soldiers have been dying in Iraq. At least 6,256 US veterans took their lives in 2005, at an average of 17 a day." [TimesOnline]

As a nation, we need to step things up.  Jason is an example of several military leaders failing to take action.  On a mental health questionnaire he had admitted thoughts about killing himself, also that he was uptight, anxious, depressed, and had feelings of hopelessness and despair.  He had also made calls home saying goodbye, and spoke several times about wanting to kill himself.  His leaders many of the times played these claims of his off as exaggerated jokes by the soldier, and even gave him back his gun after serving him with 14 days of extra duty as punishment (minutes later they found him dead in his room).  Imagine the angst of his parents, who were soldiers themselves, and feel this should have been prevented.  His dad Chris:

"We will not see a statistical decrease in Army suicides until the Army gets serious about holding people accountable when they do not do what they are trained to do."

It IS time for our leaders both in the military and back home to step up and start aiding in the mental health of our troops and our veterans. 

[Photo from Racked]

Looks like Upper West Siders will have something shiny to ring in the new year. It has been confirmed by several sources that Apple will be taking over the old Victoria Secret's store on the NW corner of 67th and Broadway, and help in Steve Jobs attempt for total world domination. The THREE other stores (Soho, 5th, and Meatpacking) are jam packed all day long. It seems like only yesterday we were jamming into the Soho location to get our hands on those shiny, bulky 30MG ipods...now we will have our choice of all ipods, nanos, ipod video, iphones, and all things apple in yet another "unhipstery" location. Now located in every fine shopping center throughout the country, we've gotten ourselves into some serious "Apple Maddness", leaving us wondering if there will be an "Apple Relapse" from the very hipsters that helped catapult the brand to greatness.

In an interesting twist regarding the fate of Gawker's managing editor position after the sudden departure of Choire Sicha, it is now being rumored (heavily and with reasonable certainty) that Nick Denton will fill the spot himself.

Denton founded Gawker as well as Gawker Media LLC, which own and runs 15 weblogs including Valleywag, Jezebel, and Gizmodo.

Denton's move would certainly not be unusual given that he has edited his blogs in the past. In 2006, after firing Nick Douglas from Valleywag, Denton edited the blog until he hired a replacement. And while this news will most likely be greeted cheerfully by Gawker's avid readership, it will no doubt disappoint the many hopefuls who were vying for one of the most coveted spots in the blogosphere. For not only is Gawker blogger royalty, but the new editor was to preside over Gawker's evolution from "snarky" media blog, to traditional news outlet.

In any event, we wish them much luck in their future endeavors.

[Image from Getty]

Last night, the Holiday party to be at was Marc Jacob's "Arabian Nights Masquerade Ball" held at the Rainbow Room.  There were Belly Dancers galore, flying carpet men, people dressed as jungle hunters, contortionists, and flamers.  The best costume of the night went to the host himself who sported a giant camel toe (shown above).  WOW.  This could be our favorite costume of the year...because who doesn't hate a giant cameltoe?  But really, we have been poking fun at the crisis that is the midlife of Marc Jacobs for some time now.  If this is what a midlife crisis entails, we are in full support!  Other guests included Amanda Lepore, Richie Rich, Valentine and Olga Rei (of SocialRank fame), Dr. Lisa Airan, and "on-again-off-again" boytoy Jason Preston.

Maybe Kristian Laliberte wasn't as confused as everyone thought. This Thursday there really is going to be a party for "The Smartest Kids in the Room", an insider party to

"reveal our plan to infiltrate the media for the next three months and discuss our launch party in March. We will be explaining our view of how the media game works in New York, and we want to invite our closest allies to come and play."

Wow. Well we're flattered we're on the invite list, just not sure if this famegame is something we should embrace or not. We have open minds, but this thing has been around for awhile and hasn't really created much of a stir, however, we do occasionally miss our socialiterank so maybe this will help fill that void, at least for awhile until people start getting bored with this highschoolish popularity game that is our city. Oh wait, that's NEVER going to happen! Game on!

Curious about just exactly what FameGame is? Direct from the invite...

More»

Who hasn't been a bit annoyed at the security measures at airports involving carrying liquids onto a plane? If its a bottle of water that is at issue, a simple chug and toss will do the trick. But sometimes this simply won't work. For example, the 64 year-old man at Nuremberg airport yesterday who tired to carry-on a liter of vodka, and then when stopped decided to drink it...

He must have been thinking his vodka was "water" a la Lindsay Lohan, cause he chugged the whole thing! Or perhaps he just did it to spite the security officers (most people aren't that delusional anyway).

In any event, he could barely stand, and had to be taken to a hospital. Talk about an ambitious guy, even some of the most seasoned drinkers in NYC could barely down a liter and remain standing. And talk about an enormous hangover.

[My Way News]