Need a new pair of patriotic shades? Make a spectacle out of yourself with the "USA Sunglasses," the latest design by Jeremy Scott for Linda Farrow Eyewear.
Who needs Alaska and Hawaii? Make a fashion and political statement with these specs, which showcase only the continental U.S. The part that matters! And they're 100% guaranteed to protect at least one eye from the sun.
Just imagine the tan lines! But what's that, you ask? How will I eat without getting Texas in my teeth? Simple. The lens rotates upward, allowing for easy consumption (and expulsion!) of food and beverages.
How much does it cost to look this shady? At a mere $200, it's quite the Louisiana Purchase.
But the "USA Sunglasses" may be his most conversation-starting creation yet. But buyer beware: if the United States is your face, that makes Canada your forehead.
USA Sunglasses, $200 on Amazon.com