There was a lot to take in at The Big Penis Book 3D Launch Party (pun marginally intended). And between the pop-out dongs, the nipple rings, and the presence of The Hedgehog himself, Ron Jeremy, it would have been easy to overlook the label on the bottle of dark rum that Ron and his pals were lugging around. Thank God we looked a little closer...
...and found out about Ron de Jeremy, Ron Jeremy's personally branded Panamanian Rum. Based on the exceedingly clever observation that "Ron" is Spanish for rum, Ron de Jeremy aspires to join such accomplished celebrity-endorsed liquor brands as Danny DeVito's Limoncello and Dan Aykroyd's Crystal Head Vodka (and we hear Lindsay is closing a deal on a line of drinkable Listerine). Clearly this is a bold step forward for pornographic alcohol, but don't take my word for it:
According to the website, Ron de Jeremy is "The Adult Rum," and it showcases this maturity in a variety of "drinxxx" including the "Ron Naked," the "Ronquiri," and the "Ronarita." To be honest, I expected the names of the drinks to be way more ridiculous, but so it goes.
So the next time you find yourself having to bring a party favor to a wedding, house party, or gangbang, head down to your local BevMo! or porn store and pick up a bottle of Ron de Jeremy. You'll never have Ron's most famous attribute, but at least now you can drink his booze until you don't care.