This summer's totally wack and never-ending June Gloom probably kept the majority of you L.A. landlubbers from recently visiting our not-so-pristine beaches, so you may have forgotten that the craptastic human race is polluting and pillaging the deep blue faster than Charlie Sheen can trash a hotel room. So hide yo sushi, hide yo harpoons cause we done pissed off Poseidon, y'all. I swear a fed-up seal flipped me the flipper the other day at Breakwater…and there's more marine muscle on the way.
Namely, Captain Paul Watson, President of the Sea Shepherd's Conservation Society, star of "Whale Wars" on Discovery Networks' Animal Planet, and inspiration for last Saturday night's stunning sustainable soirée at James Costa's Hollywood Hills eco-estate. Paul's mad as hell at the Japanese whaling ships, and he's not gonna take it anymore. The Cap'n and his caring crew have got themselves a brand new badass boat that's faster than Diddy's diamond-encrusted speed yachts (even without the video hos) but they're bypassing Miami this year for some real southern exposure: a salty smack-down with pesky poachers in the balmy Antarctic. If the Sea Shepherd's ability to throw a party is any indication of their commitment for "Operation No Compromise," then I would suggest the Japanese whalers start checking Craigslist for a new gig…
The environmentally friendly fete was also attended by a gorgeous gang of green celebs led by saucy sea-norita Michelle Rodriguez - who guest DJ'd and will be stowing away on Season 4 of "Whale Wars" - along with Isabel Lucas, Taylor Armstrong, Beau Bridges, Perrey Reeves, Vincent De Paul, Emrhys Cooper, and Ken Jordan of The Crystal Method. But the surprise star was Hannah Mermaid – a completely magical creature who perched and played poolside throughout the evening and could give Ariel a real run for her thingamabob.
Then something miraculous happened when a certain actress famous for her own swimming skills stopped by to say hello to our mono-flippered friend. Readers, please tell me you understand the sheer brilliance of watching DARYL HANNAH TALKING TO A LIVE-ACTION MERMAID?! Twas a fish called awesome.
After that meta-moment, I spent the rest of the evening gawking at the glittery L.A. skyline, mauling fresh Mango Margaritas from Peligroso Tequila, and padding around barefoot in my new cocktail onesy while stuffing my happy vegan face with endless ethical hors d'oeuvres. Bravo and bon voyage to the Sea Shepherd crew – go Moby Dick on those Ahab a-holes!
[All photos courtesy of Sea Shepherd Conservation Society]