Hipster Snob's Guide To A Night At Trousdale

by Emily Green · May 20, 2010

    Ashley Nachum, Samantha Russ

    Go HERE for more photos from the night and tag yourself and your friends!

    There's definitely a type or crowd Trousdale attracts that your average "North Central" denizen might not be too down with. The truth is, most gripes about places like Trousdale are totally valid. The bouncers are giant wieners, a substantial percentage of the girls tend to dress like, uh, hired help, and guys wearing offensive cologne and man jewelry elbow you out of the way to get to the over-priced bar.  But you can have fun at these sorts of places if you check your pretension at the door and go in with the proper mindset.  This might require a few shots of Patron. And we can help by providing you with the following guide to the ins and outs, as well as some tips, that will help you to embrace a night at Trousdale...

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    As mentioned, there will be guys in man jewelry, and they love dancing on top of booths like baboons.  It's like their mating call and how they pick up chicks. They're just having a good time and are pretty harmless if you leave them be.

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    At a packed club, it's always best if you know someone with a table. This is nothing groundbreaking. Yes, it does mean being mooch, which might be against your fundamental principles but those can take a backseat for the night. I mean, they've already been compromised if you're at Trousdale, right? It also means free drinks, being your own bartender, and not having to fight your way to the bar. So, win.

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    Guys, if you have a tank top somewhere deep in your closet you've been wanting to give a whirl for shits and giggles, but couldn't subject your friends to the second-hand embarrassment it might cause, this is the perfect opportunity.  Most places don't allow guys in tank tops but here they're welcome and totally en vogue. Ladies, just deal with it, it's only a night. Man tanks and a little armpit hair in your face never killed anyone.

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    It's going to be crowded which means heat and humidity. It can get quite tropical inside a packed club so dress appropriately. Girls, anything mesh and see-through breathes and won't make you look skanky here.  Tops that can come undone are also a good option. Similarly, it's totally acceptable if guys who forgo a tank top unbutton their shirts when it gets too warm. Give yourself some air.

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    Somehow folks still have not gotten the memo that bling is out and still rock oversized diamond encrusted accessories. And they'll be there. Rock yours if you're so inclined.  These guys wear their ice proudly like decorated war veterans and want you to look, so feel free to gawk but no touchy.

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    Dance. Who cares if you suck, everyone there's sloppy anyway. You'll get really bored standing off to the side not partaking.  Pretend you're at "M bar." This is also your chance to let out a couple fist pumps you've been suppressing.

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    Look, an indie! Yes, few and far between but they are there. On any given night you can find a handful of them who sucked it up and decided to give their snobbery a rest to join their other friends at da club. You'll likely know the ones you spot.

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    The trusty peace sign is alive and well amongst the Trousdale crowd.  If someone directs a lens at you, don't do your Polaroid hipster thing by not smiling.  Throw up a peace if you feel awkward; pointing up and down both work.

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    Don't be mind the paparazzi outside.  They will be there assuming the position at the exit to snap the celebs leaving. Just ignore them and be cordial if they're in your way. If you're someone who enjoys getting a rise out of people and the opportunity seems too good to pass up, snap the paps just as you're exiting. It throws them off and they find it exceedingly bothersome. It's irony at its best and will give you great satisfaction to end your night.