This is just some of what was said when a woman called 911 last week to report a drunken intruder in her home in the middle of the night. And guess who the hammered buffoon she was referring to is? None other than Andy Dick, ladies and gentlemen.

This may come as some surprise since the caller described him as looking like a "well-to-do, rich, white man."  If by rich, she means inebriated, then I guess it works. Oh Andy Dick, what would we do without you and your epic tales of drunken folly?

[Photo via AdamCarolla.com]