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Candidate #1
Name: Mark Cuban Qualifications: Remember when you were in first grade, and you would draw pictures of what you would do with millions of dollars, and it involved mansions with rooms full of gummy bears, private flights to a rented-out Disneyland, and crashing Lamborghini's into each other in the backyard just for giggles? Well, that's Cubes in a nutshell, the only mega-billionaire who apparently hasn't forgotten how to have fun, and is also so cool that even the 99% can't really hate on him, despite his vast personal fortune. Oh, and most importantly, the man is already a sports team owner who knows how to win. Upside: It's all upside. Cubes takes the reins and instantly puts the focus back on the fans and winning, incorporating many of the same fan-friendly promotions and high-profile talent acquisitions that he does in Dallas. His nightly presence at the games energizes the fanbase, and Dodger Stadium goes back to rocking all summer, instead of just being a dangerous place to wear orange sweatshirts. Downside: Well, it's no secret that Cubes doesn't exactly walk the company line when it comes to respecting the rules of his commissioner, and Major League Baseball is even stuffier on an ownership level than the NBA. Despite appearing to have legally died sometime in 2003, Bud Selig has dedicated his ghoulish, supernatural reign to blocking fun owners like Cuban, and already shot down his bid on the Cubs a few years back. There's not really any possibility that Mark Cuban wouldn't be a great baseball owner if given the opportunity, but there's plenty of possibility that he'd never get the chance. Odds: 10-to-1 [photo via]
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