The Class Of 2000, Ten Years Later

by guestofaguest · June 16, 2010

They were the first class to graduate in the new millennium, the class that got down to "Who Let The Dogs Out" and slow danced to Faith Hill's "Breathe" at Prom. They went on movie dates to "Gladiator" and "What Women Want". The Amnesty International Club probably wrote letters on behalf of Elian Gonzales, the Young Democrats and the Young Republicans canvassed for Gore and Bush, and the video game dorks geeked out over Meet The Sims.-

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So what is the class of 2000 doing now? Let's check in...

The Student Council Officers

Kenneth walked out of his congressional page job after receiving some unsettling IMs from Mark Foley. He makes a living these days running a fried clam strip delivery service out of his Crown Heights walk-up. He did not vote in the 2008 presidential election, but thinks Obama needs to show more emotion. Jennifer currently lives in Dupont Circle, but ditched the corridors of power to join the security team devoted exclusively to Michaele and Tareq Salahi. She's been hard at work on a screenplay for the past six years. It's a cross between a post-millennial St. Elmo's Fire (Demi Moore is set to reprise her roll) and Chasing Liberty. Mandy Moore will not be asked to return to the franchise.

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The Computer Nerds

The computer nerds spent the first semester of college obsessively trading music on Napster. When that fell through, some of them stepped blinking into the light of day, started making friends, going to parties, and now work as graphic designers at an advertising agency in SoCal. Still others went from Napster to more programing, and started social media network sites that became insanely popular. They moved to either San Francisco or New York City, where they quickly became figures on new ventures such as "Internet Week". They laugh at the fact that, without changing much, personality-wise, they are easily able to get into the hottest clubs of New York City without changing out of their polo shirts.

The Outcasts

These are the  kids who smoked under the bleachers while listening to Natalie Merchant, or played air guitar to Papa Roach. They went on to have four enjoyable years at Williams, Haverford and Wesleyan, where they found themselves suddenly surrounded by people who cared about social change and Alan Ginsberg as much as they did. After college, they applied for Fulbrights to teach English in Spain and Morocco, where they had a brief but tempestuous romance with a local, which they will compare all future relationships to for the rest of their lives. After the Fulbrights, they settled in Williamsburg, where they work at a non-profit, volunteer at an Urban Garden, and play in their 90s cover band the first Thursday of every month.

The Party Girls

These were the girls your mom would scrutinize with persed lips and say, "She seems a little wild, don't you think?"  After High School, they had One Last Crazy Summer at home before heading to UConn, USC, and Arizona State, where they were communication majors. They studied abroad in Florence, where they had wine with lunch every day and called it "vino". In college they were out every night except Sunday nights when they watched Sex And The City with their entire Sorority. They moved to the city right after college in 2004, and are now medium-level PR girls with apartments in SoHo.

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The Popular Crowd

From left to right: thrice-divorced, going in for gastric bypass surgery, clingy friend of TInsley Mortimer who lacks the nerve to tell her those handbags suck, disgraced hedge fund manager, spokeswoman for Ugandan landmine victims, meth-addled executive producer of every single Bring It On sequel that went direct-to-basic cable. The gang occasionally reunites and, drunk on Beast Lite, faded glory and broken dreams, stares at the Manhattan skyline  and wonders what could have been, wonders where it all wrong, wonders when and why dancing along to "The Thong Song" lost its thrill.

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The Class Clown

This guy used to go by Iggy--Ziggy when he really "raged"--but dropped off the map and now writes shattering addiction memoirs under the pseudonym Bawdy Lair. He's mostly off the sauce and now spends his free time shopping for and selling his own hand-knit Granny square Afghans on Etsy. Every now and again, when feeling nostalgic, he becomes a literal clown and performs at the extravagant birthday parties of the sons and daughters of the Park Avenue elite. Bawdy still makes everyone laugh at parties by drinking Zima. He does so without an ironic contempt for misguided marketing campaigns of the '90s. Bawdy holds out hope for a 3 Doors Down comeback. He knows they have another "Kryptonite" in them.

The Jocks

The jocks all attended Duke on sports scholarships, where they quickly became popular by organizing parties for the lacrosse team, and meticulously documenting their (Very active) dating lives. Some of them went on to earn MBAs at Wharton, and upon graduation landed successful jobs on Wall Street, where they enjoyed a fruitful 3 years until they lost their jobs in 2008. They spent most of 2008 drinking and getting their "personal trainer" certification. Now they work at NYSC, BSC, and WSC, respectively.

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The Goths

Got over their love of midnight-blue hairdye and dark nailpolish, eventually.

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[Photos via Facebook, and in no way indicitive of these people's actual lives, unless we were just eerily spot on...]

[Compiled By Billy Gray and Chiara Atik]