As you're undoubtedly aware, Mayor Bloomberg's ludicrous smoking ban has arrived. That means New Yorkers who light up at the beach, or in public parks or pedestrian plazas, will be subject to a $50 fine. Today we take a look at places to sneak in a cig.
Where To Sneak A Smoke When The Public Shame Becomes Unbearable
At your parents' house.
In the spaces between subway cars. Might as well break all the rules while you're at it.
Next to a steamy man-hole cover.
Next to an un-eco-friendly vehicle.
Next to a person with a gastrointestinal issues, or...
Next to anything else that emits more noxious fumes than your cigarette.
In a firehouse. We're pretty sure it's not technically legal, but firefighters do it all the time, and it's certainly the safest place to hold a burning object.
In your own private smoker's club. That's right, if you declare yourself a" non-profit member association," and don't pay any employees, you can smoke in your special clubhouse.
A roof. Any roof. Especially Mayor Bloomberg's roof.
In the park, goddammit! Bring your own tent, or share with a park resident.
In a designated smoking section we really, really hope the city will enact when public brawling over the ban inevitably ensues.
Be sure to check out Part 1 of our guide: [The Smokers' Guide To Post-Ban New York, Part 1: 5 Other Behavior-Bans New Yorkers Should Enforce]