The Associated Press is reporting today that Mayor Billionaire Bloomberg will be implementing a two-year experimental anti-poverty program in New York City that will reward the poor for good behavior, like $300 for doing well on school tests, $150 for holding a job and $200 for visiting a doctor, and $25 for attending parent-teacher conferences or for having your child maintain a 95% school attendance record.  

We are a little bit confused, isn't the point of holding a job the compensation rewards from that job itself? Isn't your health part of that motivating factor for getting a job in the first place? And don't even get us started on the issue of paying a parent to attend a parent-teacher conference...However, then we realized that this program will use private funds that Bloomberg himself has raised because he didn't want to spend government money on something this experimental. 

Now we are just thinking of ways that we could convince our mayor to reward US monetarily for OUR good behavior, such as the countless times we refrain from spraying poisonous gases at the "poor men" lining our block shouting obsenities and cat calls at us each day on our way to WORK....