• Steve Lewis weighs in the on rumors surrounding Griffin’s financial woes. [BB]

• Outer-space treadmill named C.O.L.B.E.R.T..  Stephen Colbert-1, NASA-0!  [EOnline]

• Finally some help!  Frank Bruni explains how to order food at most New York Restaurants [GrubStreet]

• Kate Moss does topless shoot for V Magazine. Shirts are just so restricting. [TheSun]

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• Spoiler! “Project Runway” preggers challenge yields super weird chicken themed “design.” Judges fail to appreciate this artist’s “vision.” [EOnline]

• Facebook upholds privacy measures. Now only friends, friends of friends, and friends of friends of friends can see you doing shots on spring break. [NYP]

• “The September Issue” faces film reviews. If deemed a worse piece of cinema than Gigli, we’s still storm the theaters. For the record, we never saw Gigli. [NYMag]

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• 90% of US bills carry traces of cocaine. We’re licking our Benjamins, as we speak. [CNN]

• Real Housewifes eviction? Are you thinking what we’re thinking? Spin off! [EOnline]

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• Fashion magazines getting thinner. Nervous friends watch as they push salad around on their plate. [WSJ]

• Vendy award finalists announced! [MidtownLunch]

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• People are saying that America could “virtually run out of sugar.” We call these individuals, “crazy people.” [WSJ]

• Anna Wintour to go on Letterman. Amazing! [NYMag]

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• Target.com bids owner Amazon farewell and plans to redesign their website for the 2011 holiday season.  [WWD]

• 19 year-old to start law school at Northwestern in the fall.  Likens herself to Doogie Howser.  Cool. [NYT]

• Bristol Palin essentially suggests that teenage girls be teases. Be sexy, but stop at third.  [NYmag]

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• A study finds that masks seem to protect against swine flu. Unfortunately, they make you look ridiculous. [CNN]

• Four women, including the victim’s wife, take bizarre revenge on a philanderer. It involves glue and sensitive areas, and it is seriously nuts. No pun intended. [NYPost]

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• Wealthy tax evaders are fessing up to the IRS in droves. The group chuckles over nostalgia for the days when it was totally cool to be a greedy d-bag. [WSJ]

• Lily Allen and Liam Gallagher get boozy on a plane ride, receive scolding from crew. Flight attendants failed to realize that plane rides are really boring, and it totally helps pass the time to hold a little, personal happy hour. [ONTD]

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• Microsoft and Yahoo reach internet search deal. See, marrying for money can work out! [WSJ]

• International experts call tanning beds as deadly as arsenic. The Real Housewives of New Jersey respond that the findings are ridiculous. Getting a little healthy glow is in no way like setting fire to something. [NYPost]

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• Amazon.com has just bought Zappos for a cool $800+ million. It’s like any old trip to Bergdorf’s, really. [TechCrunch]

• Will Ferrell escapes jury duty. The judge was worried the suspects constantly quoting the star’s movie lines might interrupt case flow. [Examiner]

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• “It’s a wonder people are even speaking to one another these days,” begins a nation-wide photo call of pictures snapped with cell phones, the results of which reveal some very impressive skills for capturing a moment, or a giant hot dog. [NYT]

• Speaking of…a picture is worth 1,000 words, and oh how photos can lie: check out the click-by-click exonerating Mr. President from a wandering eye accusation, then spend minutes thinking about how ridiculous this all is in a post-Clinton (Mr., not Hil - she’s so not affair material) world. [Gawker]

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