Lord, why did You make it so hard to be Alex Rodriguez? You make him so irresistibly handsome that he can't even walk by a mirror without feeling compelled to kiss himself. You give him enough talent (and yes, steroids, but did You not invent those as well, Lord?) to be the greatest shortstop of all time, and then You make him move positions so some ancient, herpes-laden dinosaur can limp out the end of his career.  And now we find out that he was involved in the infamous Tobey Maguire Hollywood high-stakes poker ring, and is possibly facing disciplinary action from Major League Baseball? Where does it end, Lord? More»