5. Another day, another Karl Lagerfeld quote to add to the list of the most outlandish things to ever come out of his mouth. Today, in regards to a special photo shoot for French Elle in which he's posed shopping at a grocery store:

"It's the first time I've stepped into a supermarket. It's crazy — fascinating what one can buy. There's enough here to easily gain 20 kilos."

I know he just sits on ice to keep himself fresh for whenever he emerges from the crypt he dwells in now and is on a strict diet of Diet Coke and compliments, but I seriously doubt this was his first foray in a grocery store. You guys remember when he was kinda chunky, right?...... [Fashionologie]

[Karl Lagerfeld at the grocery store via]

Karl Lagerfeld circa 2000 [via]

He'll never admit it, but I'm pretty sure before he got his trimmer figure in 2001, Uncle Karl knew his way around a cookie and baked goods aisle or two. Also, that fan? That was to keep him cool when he'd drop whatever he was doing at the sound of a nearby ice cream truck and dart out like an eager little piglet. Even with the extra weight, Karl could really bust a move for a Choco Taco.