Things To Not Do When Drinking

by Anna Lombardi · August 12, 2011

    We get it, the alcohol is flowing, you are having a good time and anything seems to go. But, after taking a look back through our photo albums I have put together a few things that you should just completely avoid do when drinking. [Photo via]

    Do not wear your sunglasses at night.

    I do not get this at all. If you are drunk and trying to hide it, the only thing wearing sunglasses after sundown does is let everybody in the room know you are in fact so drunk that you made the horrible decision to do so. Oh also, don't think that you wearing sunglasses at night means people are going to think you are somebody special. Anybody of actual importance is aware that night time sunglass wearing is a great way to draw attention to yourself, not fly under the radar. Her ping pong positioning is fierce, but how am I supposed to think she is really in it to win it if she is wearing sunglasses at night? It's hard enough keeping your eye on the ball during a night game! Maybe she just wants us to think she is Julianne Moore...

    Don't be the champagne sprayer.

    Every crowd has one, it is funny for about two seconds until you leave everybody sticky and wet for the rest of the evening.

    Yeah champagne war is fun for those two guys, but notice the girl closest to the camera and the blonde chick to the back left, not so fun for them.

    Avoid making plans for the following day.

    I am not sure what it is about drinking and the excitement of plan making, but it always happens. Sure lunch with your new drinking buddy sounds fun in the moment, but let's be honest you both know you're not going to be in the mood (not to mention remember each other's name) in the morning. Why fool yourselves? Hang over days are best spent with your close friends, not with some newbie you met at Pizza Village at 1 am.

    Drinking and playing dress up do not go well together.

    The only thing more horrifying than getting too buzzed before getting dressed to go out at night is being out, drunk and deciding to play dress up with other peoples clothing:

    1. It is not even that funny- people are just drunk and feel bad not laughing at you looking like a fool.

    2. It is really not funny the next morning when you are looking back on photographs from the night before. Oh, haha...funny dude... and he is still going at it...

    Don't try to be the hero.

    Just don't. You will wake up with a broken tooth, or arm, or leg, or iPhone. You don't want any of the above, do you?

    Five pictures later and he is still going at it. You can practically hear his friends yelling to stop. You bothered to pay for a bottle bro, let the people do their job and open it for you. No need to "save the day," you are just going to end up at the emergency room in Southampton, where will your hero be then?

    Enough with the kissy face... ENOUGH!

    What started out as a mechanism for insecure drunk people in front of the lens has somehow become an actual face flashed around without the flash of a camera. Please stop. Please... And while I have you here, don't pinky up either.

    Passing out in public, is not a good look.

    There is about a 5-10 minute window when blacking out that you have the coherence to look at your friend and say I need to pass out. Use this period to your advantage and say it to your least drunk friend, it will help you avoid the pubic pass out...

    Somebody missed their window...