It's Act Like You're 11 Day

 What's a single to do come Valentine's day? Sure there's a plethora of anti-V-day soirees, at venues classy (the New Museum), trashy (Valentine's Night at Guesthouse), and opposite-sex-bashy (the Rejection Show at the Upright Citizen's Brigade). But do you really want to be broadcasting messages of hate to the love gods? Instead of toasting the demise of romance, why not try celebrating its inception? Throw a "Now we are sixth graders" party, in honor of the days of fledgling crushes, dripping palms, and carefully applied Lip Smackers. Invite all your unattached friends, acquaintances, your overly cheerful Starbucks barista. Serve adult versions of your childhood beverages --Irish cocoa, Russian lemonade, and lots of Hi-C-colored (though hopefully not flavored), punch. Play "Never have I ever", Spin the Bottle, Truth or dare, and, if you're feeling extra, ummm, excited, "7 minutes in heaven". The playlist should be a replica of one the DJ spun so artfully at your sixth grade semi; karaoke machine optional. Add liberal dashes of red hots and conversation hearts and you're ready to rumble...