"Best $2k I Ever Spent!" What You're Secretly Accomplishing At A Pool Party

2. Getting Bronzed

This may seem obvious, but that doesn't mean working on that summer tan should not be acknowledged as one of the many benefits of pool parties. Face it, despite living in sunny Southern California, many of us spend 8 hours a day under the same harsh fluorescent lights as the rest of the working world, and the last thing I want when I go to Wisconsin to visit Aunt Edna is to take shit about how pasty I look. Simply put, a tan lets people know you're able to strike a reasonable work/life balance, and also that you get invited out to things, which means you're less likely to come off as a serial killer, dungeon master, or meth addict. This is good.