"Best 2K I Ever Spent" We Make Up New Adages With Cobra-Snake

So we realized recently that if you say anything with authority, people will totes believe you. This includes old sayings, adages, scientific laws, etc. The Cobra-Snake's latest concert outing was the perfect opportunity to test our theory . . .

"The grass is always greener on the other side." Lame. "A stitch in time saves nine." Lamer. "The squeaky wheel gets the grease." So lame we want to spit. Prepare for an adage revolution.

Grope-age is the first sign of true love.

The old go gray, and the young also go gray.

If you put your hands in the air, you will catch happiness.

A stare is like a silent handshake.

Where there's hair, there's hair.

A child in the hand is worth two trampled on the floor of the auditorium.

An untanned belly is worth a thousand words.

The sideboob is the last refuge of the uncreative.

Where there's Michael Cera-face, there are girls.

The color of blood is the color of music.

Don't count your crowdsurfing points before you fall.

The thighs and the head are separated anatomically, but not spiritually.

[All photos by The Cobra-Snake]