Hamptons Cliché Of The Week: Zoophilia

In my month and a half out here, I've noticed that a) my fellow Hampsters flock to causes like ants to a dropped ice cream cone, and b) especially if said causes aid and abet our furry or feathered or leathered friends. This Saturday you can "Get Wild" at the Wildlife Rescue Center of the Hamptons' annual benefit, while next Saturday you may have "A Wild Night for Wildlife" in honor of the Quogue Wildlife Refuge.

It isn't all fun and games, though. In fact, some put pets before parties. Many a firework and stretch of sand lies untouched, lest a young piping plover suffer development retardation, and in Southampton, circuses are domestic-only affairs. While most of the time I can't help but think we ought to help out our fellow naked apes first and foremost, one tongue-lolling pant from a sea-grizzled cairn terrier is all it takes to sway my mind, at least temporarily.