The Name-Calling Drama Of The Former Greek Royal Family

What's in a name? That which we call a royal by any other name would sound as sweet... no?

Well, in the case of the former Greek royals, not so.

Back in 1862, Greece, ever a lively lot, overthrew their King, ending the reign of the House of Wittelsbach. After dating around and feeling out the European monarchy market, the country settled on 17-year old Prince William of Denmark, of the House of Glücksburg, to take the throne. 

Long and complicated story short, that kid's family was in power until 1924, when Greece went into a truly impressive angsty and energized era, in the span of just 11 years going through twenty-three changes of government, a dictatorship, and thirteen coups d'etat. 

And you thought January 6th was a lot?

After all that excitement, the obviously exhausted country voted to bring back the monarchy in 1935, and so - because who would hold a grudge when they could instead hold power? - the House of Glücksburg moved back into their palaces like business as usual. Time went on, people died, the oldest males took over, until 1967 when King Constantine II got himself, and his country, into a real pickle by trying to play politics. Following his exile, after years of unrest and instability - and, can you believe it, another dictatorship - in 1974 the country voted him off the island Survivor-style, formally abolishing the monarchy. 

In 1994, the then Socialist administration - it's really just like Mark Twain said, if you don't like the government in Greece, just wait a minute - stripped Constantine of his nationality.

Eventually, some years later, he was given the opportunity to have a Greek passport. The catch? He had to adopt a surname. You know, like a normal person. 

Full of itself is the head that wore a crown? Sentimental for status? Purely disinterested in doing the paperwork? Whatever the reasoning, Constantine went no deal and stuck with the pop star first-name-only situation, continuing to style his family as princes and princesses.

Moderately interesting history lesson complete, I ask you, are you still a King or Prince of a country when that country no longer holds you as such? Or does a crown outlive a kingdom?

Today, Constantine's son Pavlos is recognized everywhere as Pavlos of Greece. Everywhere, that is, except for in Greece, where he and his family are legally recognized as Glücksburgs. 

In a recently aired interview on the Greek television show 365 Moments, Pavlos shared, "I am Pavlos of Greece. My last name has always been that, 'of Greece.' Why do I have to change it? When that law was made it was only to attack us... Glücksburg is a name that refers to Germans and we weren't even Germans... The thing is, the Germans were the villains of the war. With that last name they only wanted to make us look worse."

I mean, is this trailer more dramatic than a Succession season finale or what? 

The music, the lighting, the camera angles, the walking and talking wearing button downs and vests!

But I digress. 

For the most (cliché) part this is a free world, and if Elon Musk can name his son X Æ A-Xii, Pavlos and family can certainly adopt whatever last name they'd like. But pretending they've no attachment to the monicker of Glücksburg is a bit eye-roll-inducing, no?

Understandably, historical context aside, Glücksburg is by no means a great last name. It's sticky - it falls out of your peanut butter filled mouth and just sits there like a lump. For god's sake it has an umlaut, a linguistic signal, a brace-yourself-warning-sign, of a most unsophisticated sound to come.

And understandably he was born in Greece and therefore feels a German last name is a slight. But that's also how last names work - normal families carry them around and pass them along for a long time, and where people end up geographically might make them no longer feel relevant when they've embraced a new culture, but such is the course of this patriarchal world. 

And not for nothing, but of all the possible names to choose, "of Greece" is an anything but subtle claim to a position that Greece has no interest in his family holding. A contentious point further escalated by his family's continued use of royal titles.

To be most accurate, Pavlos is a former Crown Prince of Greece, and a current Crown Prince of nothing. So why the pomp?

While his wife Marie-Chantal's Instagram profile doesn't mention a title anywhere, her children's clothing brand's website and social media do, naming her as Princess Marie-Chantal of Greece.

In media headlines, their children are often extended the same 'courtesy title.' 

So, what do you reckon? 

Once a royal always a royal? 

Prince? Please! 

Who even cares either way?

[Photo via @mariechantal22]