"Best $2k I Ever Spent!" David Guetta, The First Musician Immortalized At Grauman's Chinese Theatre

Of course, regardless of how I feel about David Guetta and his painfully cheery club music, he's certainly having a moment right now. In fact, "I Gotta Feeling" was recently declared a New Classic by Slate, their suggestion for cultural artifacts that may stand the test of time. To this, two points. First, if I still have to hear "I Gotta Feeling" at weddings and Bar Mitzvahs 20 years from now, I'm selling all my possessions, buying a lot of guns, and moving to a cabin in the woods in Michigan. Second, it's worth noting that among the other things Slate declared to be New Classics are, um, Ugg boots and the Star Wars Kid viral video. So, yeah. Slate, ladies and gentlemen.