Earlier today, we reported 77-year-old Larry King prowling Trousdale, perhaps in search of a young hipster maiden to line up as the latest edition of Mrs. Larry King. Whatever his motivations, it got us thinking about how awesome it is to party with our seniors. Whether it's getting plastered with relatives at Thanksgiving or just shooting the shit with some random whitebeard who practically lives at your local dive bar, the older generation has better stories, better advice, better taste in music, and an appreciation for life in general that might only come with experience. So other than Larry (and Jack Nicholson, who's just too obvious), who are the aging celebs that we'd most like to run into while out on the town?
5. Keith Richards
It goes without saying that if you run into Keith, you're in for a good time. The Rolling Stones guitarist/Pirate captain/walking drug encyclopedia has certainly had more than his share of them. While not every single story told about him is true, he's done enough crazy shit in his life that if you heard, for example, that he had once rolled up and smoked Winston Churchill's ashes while partying with Prince Albert, you would at least have to believe it was possible.
Luckily for your own health, Keith only smokes weed (and hash) these days, so your hangout will most likely take the form of a chilled-out smoke sesh with some great stories of the crazy days, as opposed to waking up in Bangladesh in a bathtub full of ice with a kidney missing. But whatever he proposes, we say go with it. The guy wrote "Satisfaction," for God's sake, and besides, if anything was going to kill him, it would have done it already.
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4. Goldie Hawn
Why wouldn't you want to party with Goldie?
-Kickass A-List career that peaked back when Hollywood was fun? Check.
-Successful longtime relationship with Snake Plissken? Check.
-Smoked up her kids? Check.
-Still capable of having a good time? Check.
-Starred in movies with Warren Beatty and Mel Gibson and has somehow retained her health, reputation and dignity? (Astoundingly) Check.
-GMILF? Check.
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3. Sean Connery
What's left to say about the many ways Sir Sean Connery straight-up rocks? The man was James Bond, Indiana Jones Sr., The Highlander, and John Mason, just to name a few. He turned down a pro contract with Manchester United and once kicked a mobster's ass after stealing his movie-star girlfriend. To put it more succinctly, he's got more badass in his beard trimmings than you or I could ever hope to gain in 10 lifetimes. So whether you want to grab a pint while you watch the game or kill a Kodiak Bear with your bare hands, he's your man.
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2. Bill Clinton
The common analysis of why Americans elected George W. Bush is that, despite his lack of an even basic grasp on foreign policy, he just seemed like the kind of guy you'd want to have a beer with. This was exceedingly stupid reasoning, given that Dubya was a born-again cokehead who (at least officially) hasn't had a drink in 20 years. But it was also exceedingly stupid because if there was one living politician who you know could really throw down, it's gotta be William Jefferson Clinton. Friends with everyone from Bono to Chad Ochocinco, President Clinton was like the ultimate bar buddy: a good listener, a charismatic guy, and never afraid to take one for the team. Imagine if he actually showed up at a bar in LA? I swear to God, I'd even go back to Voyeur if he were there.
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1. Bill Murray
If you don't know about Bill Murray's recent exploits, you haven't been paying attention. Whether motivated by some weird 2/3-life-crisis, the sad-clown disorder that most of his current film characters seem to have, or just a genuine desire to Keep It Really Weird, it seems our favorite Ghostbuster has been spending an ample amount of time lately going to karaoke bars, crashing loft parties, and generally just living it up.
What would your night out with Bill Murray consist of? Well, since you never know when he might show up, you don't really get to choose. But if you don't think Bill Murray possibly wandering into your house party and playing Monopoly, pouring shots, or maybe leading a spirited singalong is the coolest thing you've ever heard of, you're probably reading the wrong article.
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BONUS: Woody Harrelson
Technically, we can't comment on Woody's pending membership to the "Over-60 Party Animals" Club, because Woody won't be turning 60 until July 23 of this year. But come on, it's Woody Fucking Harrelson. Enough said.
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