Gwyneth Paltrow Is Engaged!

by Stephanie Maida · November 21, 2017

    Well, reportedly. You know how these things go.

    Us Weekly claims that the mother of all things green and Goop-y has said yes to longtime beau Brad Falchuk, confirming that she really is just as basic as every bitch you went to high school with. We mean, a holiday season engagement? Come on!

    Brad, an Emmy-nominated television writer and father of two who does indeed boast the same name as one of her infamous exes, met Gwyn on the set of Glee back in 2014, although they kept their relationship under wraps for a year. While the rumored ring has yet to make a public appearance, an insider told Us that the couple has already taken their engagement photos.

    We'd be surprised if she doesn't present them in an obnoxious album on Facebook.

    In any case, congrats! Wishing you guys years of gluten-free happiness and shaman-blessed crystal dildos.

    [Photo via Getty]