How Celebrities Celebrated 4th Of July In Malibu

Ah, 4th of July. The great equalizing holiday we in L.A. head to the beach to celebrate and reminds us that we're all in this bitch together. It doesn't matter who you are, who you know, or who you've banged—EVERYONE will sit in hellacious traffic on PCH, bump into someone they've made a concerted effort to avoid for a year while wearing a swimsuit, have no cell reception/a phone with a dead battery, and suffer from varying degrees of FOMO. This is also true of celebrities who descended on Malibu with the masses yesterday to celebrate their freedom to party at a stranger's house, just like we did. There's a song I heard once that goes, "this land is your land, this land is my land"—same sort of concept but more specifically with parking spots and beachfront property. So if you were on that 'bu tip yesterday here's a look at some celebrities and other famous but irrelevant people you may have shared a stray, unclaimed beer with or whose thigh cellulite you probably saw cruise by on the beach. Oh, and if you saw some astronaut attempting to walk on the beach in HIGH HEELS, that was Paris Hilton. [Photo via]

Zac Efron and Ashley Tisdale got a little flirty this weekend, involving wet piggy-back rides. But, you guys, I'm worried about Vanessa. If she sees these photos, she will just.... Ashley Tisdale, Zac Efron [Photo via]

Janice Dickinson was looking a little, um, frightening this weekend. The combination of her nicely-sunburned skin and her intimidating abs are enough to send anyone running. I feel bad for the person she was charging towards when this photo was taken and hope they survived.

Janice Dickinson [photo via]

Country star LeAnn Rimes showed off a skimpy red bikini with husband Eddie Cibrian. Barf. Barf on both of them. Meanwhile, Lindsay Lohan had two things to celebrate this weekend: the end of her house arrest, as well as her 25th birthday. And boy, was she twerkin it on the beach yesterday. Freedom to wear those shorts in public when you're seven Red Bulls deep never felt so f*&^ing good, right Linds?!? Eddie Cibrian, LeAnn Rimes [photo via], Lindsay Lohan [photo via]

The Hiltons were beachside as well. Nicky Hilton and her boyfriend David Katzenberg cozied up together for fireworks like normal human beings. Meanwhile Paris... I mean where do we even start? David Katzenberg, Nicky Hilton [photo via], Paris Hilton [photo via]

Look at her. She threw a beach party wearing this. Poor Nicky. She's like trying to be a fashion designer or something and this is her blood relative she can't even persuade not to wear high heels, which are HIDEOUS by the way, to the BEACH. And the sailor cap. What the hell is that? The whole thing is tragic and makes me confused as to why no one has explained that wearing white makes her glowing orange complexion all the more jaundice-y. No me gusta. Another day, another truly offensive Paris Hilton look to inflict on the world.

Paris Hilton [photo via]

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Samantha Ronson, Nicole Richie, and the rest of their oh-so-chic friends relaxed on the beach while waiting for fireworks. Samantha Ronson, Nicole Richie [photo via]

Rachel Zoe took a break from styling reality television and bypassed the beach for a little shopping with her new baby at the Malibu Country Mart. Rachel Zoe [photo via]

New mommy Pink and her husband, Carey Hart, took part in Malibu's Independence Day Parade. We're going to give her the benefit of the doubt that the hat was just part of her festive outfit for the holiday and not fashion statement. Pink, Carey Hart [photo via]

Reese Witherspoon opted to spend the day with her kids on the beach. Loving the red, white, and blue family color scheme going on. They look like a J.Crew ad. Not even mad at it. Reese Witherspoon [photo via]

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley got some much-needed relaxation in the midst of her Transformers media blitz and upcoming GQ photo shoot with boyfriend Jason Statham. Rough life. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley [photo via]