[all photos by Natasha Ryan for metromixny] Metromix New York has an...exquisite collection of photos from Sunday's Easter Parade, and so help us God, you have to see some of these hats and what some people did to their dogs.-
Now, we have a lot to cover so step lively. We've combed through the many pictures from that glorious day and will now announce the winners of some the holiday's most prestigious award categories.
Navigating through Easter attire without wanting to take out your eyeballs is a skill, just like successfully completing a pull-up. Luckily, we're skilled in both trades, so let's start off nice and easy, shall we?
The winner for "Paying Respects To Jesus, Respectfully" is the woman below. She probably went to church that morning and tookthe holiday's significance seriously. But she's also not dead, and knew just how to indulge her cooky side without being demeaning.
Next we have "Best Traffic Obstruction." Don't be deceived: the winner of this award is, in fact, receiving a compliment. Yes, if the street wasn't closed off for the parade, passing cars would be honking their brains out. But this costume is great because it says, "Hey, I'm a flowerpot. What the hell are you supposed to be?" We're all for unabashed Easter pride. And anything that puts the people who run red lights in their place.
Below is the winner for "Cirque du Bunny." What, no good? Have you ever seen a bunny that pink? Exactly. That's what I thought. Ten bucks says this guy's either French or French Canadian.
This woman wins the "Lady Gaga" award because in this day and age, every contest or competition has a Lady Gaga category. It's just the world we live in now.
We're still working on coming up with a category for these winners. All we know is they deserve to win at something. We just don't know what yet. We'll keep you posted.
Now onto the k-9 part of the ceremony. Since it was a beautifully sunny Easter, people brought their dogs out for a stroll. But of all the four-legged, Easter-ignoramuses out there, who reigned supreme? Well, the guy below didn't bring much to the table, but he looks a lot like Bo Obama. And on the off chance this is actually Bo Obama, we have to recognize his presence.
The next three souls are still licking their wounds from Sunday. Understandably so. But they win awards for their loyalty and capacity to forgive. And isn't that what the holidays are about? That is, when it's not about searching for hard boiled eggs in bushes?
These two win "Best Shameless Display of Wealth." Even though Segways have been around for a few years, we don't come across them every day -- which means there's still some allure there. So riding down the streets on an apparatus that costs at least $6,000 ON THE DAY OF JESUS' RESSURECTION takes some cojones.
"Best Use of Time Management" Goes to this woman and her daughter, who most certainly did not put their getups together the night before. You know they started planning this look at least a few weeks back. We bet that nest is made from real twigs.
This woman is hilarious. We can tell. We're going to hook her up with the "Best Thrifter" award, which goes to one special individual each year who manages to avoid the Peep-grabbing craze of shopping around Easter by taking something they just had lying around and making it appropriate for the occasion. We're betting this was a Halloween costume, at the least. But this woman, who's probably as smart as a tack, thought to herself, "hey. Who said all Easter eggs have to be boiled? Why can't one be sunny side up?" (We're all over this.)
This lady and guy win the "Liza Minelli Is Everywhere" award. Because Liza Minelli is everywhere. She just is. And more often than not, she's not too far behind Lady Gaga.
And last but not least, we present the recipients of the "Martha Stewart's Easter Done Right" Award. The pastel, the shrubbery, the hats -- it's pure bliss. Right down to that "I swiped the last pink peeps from under your nose at Duane Reade, and I'm not sorry for it," smirk.