If it feels wrong, it's probably wrong
Even though we called this the idiot's guide, we know you know better than to try and bring your bike on a subway during rush hour. Basic human experience will give you the knowledge to understand subway etiquette. If you feel funny while pulling out your pungent lunch to eat on the train, or get an uneasy inkling while taking up two whole seats, it's probably because you know deep down that what you're doing is wrong. Follow these urges to be a better MTA patron, and save the Shake Shack for when you make it home.
[Photo via @magsamos]