Happy Hump Day: 5 Things That Made Us Happy Today

Happy Hump Day, everyone. It seemed like a sick joke this week when we woke up and it was Monday but we're halfway through this mother so give yourself a pat on the back. Coming to you poolside on this beautiful 80° Wednesday: from a pre-Coachella Big Audio Dynamite show to a funky adventure with Soul Train and Aretha, Chrysler's f-bomb tweet and more, we bring five things that make this a happy hump day.

1. My friend Erika found this last night by mistake when she was looking for something else and it's definitely the best accidental find of the week. It just makes me happy. We love "Soul Train" line dances and we love Aretha Franklin. Now let's go on a funky adventure to see what happens when you combine the two and top it off with a DJ who likes to post his remix experiments on YouTube:

On a total side note, I decided that if I ever have a daughter, I'm naming her Aretha. And she will be blond and feisty.

2. Alex found this gem brought to us by the trusty Fox News network. While judgmental conservatives blowing hot air to blame the problems of the world on right-leaning culture and "youth" is standard programming over there, this is not: former senator Alan Simpson says grandparents don't like their grandchildren these days because they listen to too much "Enema Man" and "Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dog". Grandma Eileen, Grandpa Sidney, I thought you liked me even though I listen to Snoop Poop since I'm not holding the fact that you watch "Everybody Loves Raymond" against you. I thought that was the deal? Watch the clip HERE.

3. Big Audio Dynamite reunites for their first live show after 20 years off the scene at Coachella next month. Except it's actually going to be their second time performing live in two decades because they just booked a show at the Roxy for the night before! We just bought our tickets and suggest you do the same ASAP if you want to kick off your weekend by getting up close and personal with Mick Jones for this pre-Coachella show before heading to the desert on Friday. [Photo via Hypebeast]

4. This is so brilliant. Someone dropped the f-bomb from Chrysler's official Twitter account today. The tweet has since been deleted but because Twitter is forever thanks to ReTweets, we're still able to give you almost exactly the same thing that thousands of its followers saw today:

Ha! The someone who released this into the universe obviously has a great sense of humor but might be the biggest idiot since it will cost him his job if Chrysler employs him. They should really thank him and give him a raise because in a single tweet he did what their marketing department hasn't ever been able to do: get us talking about Chryslers which I think is a first for me.

5. Speaking of idiots, this is beyond. Like just beyond. A letter sent by a member of frat Kappa Sigma's USC chapter to his frat brothers has surfaced on how to be an effective "cocksman" like himself, which from what I understand from his description is another way of saying sick, sick, rape-y, racist, supreme frat douche of all fratty fratastic douches. The memo encourages all Kappa Sig brothers to be cocksmen and participate in their new weekly "Gullet Report" to share "raw data on who fucks and who doesn't" and then it gets really disgusting after he leaves his brothers this reference note before getting into particulars:

"Note: I will refer to females as 'targets'. They aren't actual people like us men. Consequently, giving them a certain name or distinction is pointless."

The particulars are unlike anything we have ever come across and so off the charts vile it doesn't even seem real because it's difficult to imagine someone not only conceiving but believing what was detailed. USC and Kappa Sig's national organization are up in arms as they should be and say they are "investigating" the source. Some are saying it might be the act of someone trying to cast the frat in a bad light which I'd like to believe, but it's so detailed with a glossary of terms and ranking systems that it doesn't seem likely.... Anyway let's bring this home: it's a happy hump day because you're not the president of Kappa Sig's USC chapter.