New Low: Letting Your Girl Use You As Her Personal Burro

by Alex Gilman · April 6, 2011

    There's no doubt that gender roles are less defined today than they used to be. Between stay-at-home dads, female Secretaries of State, and the legendary pro-wrestler-turned-male-nanny set, we completely salute the concept that there's no right gender for any given job. We do, however, still draw a line at forcing human beings to perform tasks meant for the animal kingdom. All of which brings us to Gladstone's last Friday night, and a poor, decrepit man who has been unceremoniously transformed into a pack mule by what we can only assume is a girlfriend without a conscience.

    Where is the owner of this purse? Girls take their purses with them to the bathroom, so that's not it. Is she dancing with another guy? Double-fisting appletinis? Taking a swim? And what strange, magical power does she have over this man that he's willing to haul Chanel handbags like a Beverly Hills burro, waiting docilely until this harpy decides she wants her Burt's Bees lip balm? Does this sad sack even realize the damage he's doing to men in healthy relationships everywhere by being photographed as a human coat rack? We may never know the answer to these questions, because if I were this guy, I'd flee the country, tonight. Just make sure the old ball and chain doesn't find out- I'd hate to see what she would do if she were actually mad.

    [St Bernard photo via]

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