One More Reason Not To Get Pregnant

by SUSANNAH LONG · July 9, 2010

    Newsflash: Forever 21 is launching a maternity line. Awesome! Now a baby taking up space in your abdomen won't prevent you from indulging in awkward cuts and sequined animal prints, right? Wrong.

    Sorry for the bad news preggos, but Forever 21's new maternity offshoot of its Love 21 Contemporary line is painfully boring. Observe:

    Forever 21Forever 21

    Gray leggings. White tanks. Generic jeans. That's about it. To be fair, those jeans are $13.80. And yes, they look great for $13.80 jeans. But here's what you're missing out on, you baby-making, neutral-colors-wearing, future-haggard-fatsies:

    So don't get pregnant. It'll make you dull and tasteful.

    At least, once the baby is born, you can make little clothes for it out of Forever 21 accessories stock. How cute will it look papoose'd up in some of these wicked leggings?!

    Too bad Forever 21 doesn't sell jeggings. Yet.

    (Sidebar: As Boing-Boing points out, Forever 21 is one of the many businesses that prints "John 3:16" on their products or packaging [in the case of Forever 21, it's on their yellow plastic bags]. Boing-boing wonders if the maternity clothes are related to the missionary message; we're pretty sure the maternity extension is just because it's cheap to add elastic to stuff, and because dummies keep getting knocked up.)

    [all photos courtesy of Forever21]