NYC Has Officially Gone To The Rats... But Actually!

All summer long, I've been noticing rats smushed on the street. Here a rat, there a rat, everywhere a flat rat.

Besides feeling bad for the poor little flap jack rodents, I mostly thought nothing of it.

Then the other week I was walking my dog in the West Village. It was trash night, so all the fancy townhouse people had thrown their garbage all over the sidewalk. Correction: all the fancy townhouse people's house managers had thrown their garbage all over the sidewalk.

It was late, I was in a rush for my dog to settle her outside business, and then, mid-stride, I kicked a rat. 

Like football field goal style kicked a rat. 

I screamed. The rat screamed. I was wearing flip flops so of course once the shock of the encounter slightly subsided the hysteria of whether or not to just amputate my foot right then and there erupted.

A few minutes later I turned down a different street where I watched a different rat casually waddle down the sidewalk in front of me for an entire block.

All of this to say, it's the summer of rats and nowhere is safe.

According to NY1, "in the first four months of this year, 311 received 7,400 calls about rat sightings. That’s an over 60% jump compared to the same period in 2019 before the pandemic began."

First of all, what's 311? Is that some random number for people who always find themselves wanting to talk to a supervisor?

And second, what the fuck!?

In response to this rat-pocalypse, the City Council recently approved $4.8 million in their budget to be set aside for "rat mitigation."

Putting their plans into place will of course take forever. And in the meantime, as Pat Marino, who leases the city his rat traps, told Gothamist, "we're having an impact, we're catching a lot of rats. But there are millions out there. I don't want to be an alarmist, but there are a lot."

Our advice?

Wear closed toe shoes...

[Photo by Yumi Matsuo]