New York Waiters Are A Delicate Breed

by guestofaguest · January 11, 2008

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    Gothamist just informed us that our genius idea to save the world and revolutionize cheap dining has been already executed by another company named uwink. Expect touch screen ordering at your table at a restaurant in New York very soon.

    But in all seriousness, we are going to miss waiters. Especially the ones who spill drinks on you, and forget your order after not writing it down.  Afterwards, embarrassed but too proud to admit they fucked up, they sneak up to your table and say affirmatively, "you wanted that burger medium well, right?", as if to check on your order, but in reality they simply forgot, because they were too dumb to write it down in the first place...The ones that make you feel horrible for asking for another set of silverware or a glass of water (it's Sunday and you're hungover....it's like torture waiting for some liquid reinforcements sometimes). Then there's the waiters that are too cool for you and everyone else that surrounds them. They bring you food (who cares if it's what you ordered) and you are just thankful to be graced by their 2.5 seconds of face time, because, you know it's AN HONOR to be able to be tipping someone as cool as them.  This isn't your average town, and it's not your average Applebee's.  We are in New York here.  We are stupid enough to pay $50 for a bite size dover sole at a certain pretentious upper east side establishment and we are certainly going to have to make up for that.  The servers here are some of the worst in the land, but you may be able to recognize your local server in the next episode of Law & Order, and well, that's just priceless.

    And, having many friends in the service business, we won't even START with the idiots that they are forced to wait on.