The Most Nightmare Mothers-In-Law In History

I am divorced now, but my ex-MIL was a strange bird. For starters, the ex-inlaws liked shopping for gifts months or even years in advance, such that for the first several holidays with my ex, I received gifts that they had picked out for his ex-girlfriend. It didn't go so far as to have her name on the items, but they were very clearly intended for her with her favorite colors and motifs (stars and moons) all over everything. I guess they assumed the items were generic enough that I wouldn't know, and maybe it was my ex's fault for telling me so much about his ex-girlfriend, but I knew these were leftover gifts from his last relationship! I dutifully and diligently wrote polite thank you notes and then either sold, donated, or gave the items to my ex if he found them useful (e.g., a blanket).

Fast forward to after marriage, and the gifts got stranger. My ex husband had gotten a vasectomy but apparently never mentioned it to his parents. Ok, it's a private thing, so I can see why you wouldn't bring it up. However, one Christmas, my ex-MIL gave me a maternity top and a giant folding screen with room for 15 photos in it. Along with these came a huge box of stationery replete with baby announcements and thank you notes. Eeep. To round it out, she bought me long johns in the wrong size and a Santa and reindeer cookie jar. When I returned the cookie jar, it was worth $1.70. Hooo boy.

Finally, in terms of gifts, my "favorite" was one year when the ex- MIL and FIL went on and on for months straight about juicers. Oh, they are so great, and you can put anything you want in them and the juice is awesome. They talked about recipes and the companies and where to snag good deals on fruits/veggies, and everything was juicers-juicers-juicers for months on end. So, it's Christmas time, and they slide this huge, big, heavy gift across the floor to us. We look at each other with this knowing glance of "here comes our juicer" and begin to tear into the wrapping paper. When the paper was gone, our gift was revealed: an air compressor! Whee!

I could make a whole separate post of weird situations and strange things she said to me, but the gifts always stuck out in my mind as extra odd. I know it's the thought that counts, but I spent a lot of time wondering what the heck she was thinking!

[via Reddit]