[Image Source: New York Magazine]
Now that you've gotten this far, it means that you're computer screen hasn't cracked. Or that you've been blinded by the image above. And if you've managed to analyze the image, you now know why it took Lohan 3 hours in makeup, and that the long undistinguished list of men who have slept with Lindsay Lohan didn't engage in sexual congress because of her looks, but rather fame, money, exposure, etc.
What's most disappointing about this photo shoot is not that New York Magazine jumped at the opportunity, or that Bert Stern deceived himself into thinking Lohan was actually an "actress" as well as the "perfect actress for this project", but rather that its a pure insult to a true sex icon, Marilyn Monroe.
While Monroe played buxom blondes, and she wasn't a great actress, she wasn't terrible either. And she was in classics like Some Like It Hot, Gentlemen Prefer Blonds, and Seven Year Itch. Not Herbie: Reloaded and Mean Girls. Lohan in comparison is a Mickey Mouse Operation. But alas, that comparison doesn't work since that would be an insult to Mickey Mouse.