Sign Barack's Birthday Card!

by KELLI CHEEVER · July 28, 2010

    -Move over, My Super Sweet 16 spoiled bitches, our Commander in Chief is celebrating his blow-out birthday on August 4th, and y'all's bash has nothing on his. That's right, our dear President Barack Obama is turning 49, and by a lovely request from his wifey, we all need to send him some very special birthday love. Check out the website here to sign the President's virtual birthday card, but shhh, it's a surprise!  Without further ado, here are our top five birthday wishes for the man who doesn't quite have it all:

    For your bday, B-Rock, We wish...

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    5) Lindsay Lohan doesn't get released from the slammer before your bday bash...but if she does you'll have to beef up your security and hide the booze from this party crasher.

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    -4) Wikileaks doesn't get a hold of footage of your after-party.

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    3) Lebron James takes out an hour special on ESPN to let the world know how amazing of a baller YOU are.

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    2)  Tony Hayward resolves to take some time off post his B.P. days, relax, and maybe even join your family for vaca on the Gulf, and if you're lucky, grill up some freshly caught delicious flounder!

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    [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYMxOzxKYYo[/youtube]

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    1) And like anyone celebrating their birthday, here's our number one wish for you: (we'll let Jeremih take it from here...)

    [photo via]