Dating A Nightlifer: Can A Party GIRL Be Tamed?

by Whitney Young · March 1, 2012

    A couple weeks ago, I braved the bloody battlefield that is love in New York’s nightlife scene, to find out if a party boy could be tamed. But I neglected one very important detail in the whole nightlife romance equation—the party GIRL. Let's face it, despite stereotypes, not all women are hopeless romantics desperate to get "wifed up" and pop out a baby.

    The party girl--she’s hot. She’s independent. She drinks for free. And she’s got options. Why would any 20-something New York gal give up her glamorous life in the fast lane to settle down with one guy, when she could have them all? Call her Miley Cyrus, 'cause she can't be tamed. Check out what these party girls had to say...

    [Photo via]

    Girl #1: Michelle Madonna

    Michelle Madonna is somewhat of a social.  A nightlife social. Her self-proclaimed occupation is "being hot," and she likes to pop bottles with friends. Seems to fit the party girl mold, right? Maybe. Or, maybe there's more than meets the eye (or tweet, if you're one of her nearly 3,000 twitter followers).

    "I’m not a party girl, so to speak. I’m just a normal 22-year-old. Am I supposed to sit at home during the week and watch Lifetime every night? I just like to look pretty and get drinks with friends."

    But some of Madonna's tweets (@ThatMadonnaGirl) could lead to other conclusions:

    Her response?

    "You can't believe everything you read on twitter."

    It's true. In fact, Madonna's over-the-top party princess image seems a bit played up on social media sites. For instance, the brunette bombshell is actually in a committed relationship, and says, for her, cheating isn't a symptom of partying,

    "If I’m with someone I love, I wouldn’t want to cheat and if I did, then I wouldn’t be in the relationship in the first place."

    You'd probably never gauge any of this information from appearances. But as it turns out, Madonna says any and all relationship issues she has stem from her boyfriend's stupidity, not nightlife.

    "He's cool with it, and is able to keep up with me without being intimidated, and never gets jealous. That’s why we work so well."

    This party girl has been tamed.

    Girl #2: Ariella*

    Ariella* (named changed for anonymity) considers herself a "social person" with a great group of friends, friends of friends, and friends with tables.  It's not that Ariella can't be tamed. It's just that when she's out, she's not looking for love in the club.

    She parties by a very important motto:

    "Party boys are for partying; don't be Rachel Uchitel."

    Furthermore, if you're one of the guys trying to woo this party gal with your stack of Benjamin Franklins, she's not impressed.

    "The rich guys aren't generally hot, and if they are, they're fucking several models. At once."

    Madonna agrees,

    "money does not impress me. Rich guys flaunting their money at clubs couldn’t be less attractive to me. I don’t need guys to pay for me. I can pay for all that myself."

    Miss Independent, she's got her own.

    Girl #3: Carson Griffith

    For Carson Griffith, Senior Columnist for the infamous New York Daily News Gatecrasher, partying is in the job description.

    "I have to go out for work, and work is life."

    Griffith, 26, started covering parties nearly four years ago, (she got her start right here at GofG!) and gradually climbed the ranks to one of Manhattan's most renowned party girls, even being featured on an episode of Gossip Girl.

    Even when cranberry vodkas play an integral part of your life, Griffith says she'd make it work for the right dude.

    "I’m never going to be sitting at home twiddling my thumbs, but I might have a family someday. I appreciate a good group of people, a good meal, and a good time," Griffith says. "At the end of the day, we’re all a bit of a hopeless romantic, aren’t we?"

    It's just going to take "a good hairbrush and Jude Law's accent" to tame this wild one.

    Girl #4: Veronica*

    Veronica* (named changed for anonymity, again), an advertising executive, considers herself a retired nightlifer--proof that some party girls can indeed be tamed. At 28, she says her unruly days are a thing of the past--but a significant part of her past, nevertheless.

    Veronica moved to the city upon graduating from college, and quickly fell into the nightlife scene.

    "Being in advertising had a lot to do with it," she says. "I was being wined and dined by clients at some of the fanciest restaurants and most exclusive clubs in NYC."

    Then she got older; wiser.

    "Those were probably some of the best years of my life, but I have to say, as I got older and more focused on my career, going out became less of a priority."

    But Veronica says she never allowed her nightlife and dating life to intersect in the first place.

    "Going out was never really about meeting guys," she says. "It was more about having fun with my friends and letting loose. I definitely don't think a club is the place to meet people."

    Yet, ironically, Veronica met her ex-boyfriend at a club.

    "He was not at all into nightlife, and although in the long run it didn't work out, meeting someone who lived outside of that world was a great thing for me. I needed the outlet."

    To the vodka-guzzling vixen, it seems to be about meeting Prince Charming in the right place--a coffee shop, the laundromat, a bookstore... anywhere EXCEPT the dance floor. She's not searching for a Romeo who will just teach her how to dougie.

    Perhaps the remedy for partying, whether party boy or party girl, is meeting someone worthwhile who doesn't party as much. The goal is to find someone who can engage in quality conversation, and has more to offer than what's in their wallet. And most importantly, someone who doesn't only look good in low lighting.

    Take note, folks. Check your booze and bragging at the door.