What Your Go-To Trendy Workout Class Says About You

You spend $300 on vintage t-shirts from "What Goes Around Comes Around" and $200 on jean shorts from One Teaspoon. You smoke cigarettes, but only because it makes you looks cool when you tell people you picked up the habit from your European ex and you like how raspy it makes your voice sound. You've got a waif like figure and amazing bone structure, which is attractive enough to have Terry Richardson approach you to ask if he could photograph you. You went through with it, and you'll tell anyone who'll listen that while he didn't "go there" with you, the allegations about him don't really shock you. 

Your boyfriend looks like he could be a member of Kings of Leon. But then again, if any grungy, pasty white hipster dude approached me and told me he was a member of Kings of Leon, I would absolutely believe him. He relishes people asking if he played in a band because he "just has that look," but as it turns out, he used to play bass in Justin Bobby's band back when he was on The Hills. Your boyfriend wears $400 Local Authority apparel and his entire tattoo sleeves are done by Bang Bang or Jon Boy, yet he still will bitch and moan about capitalism and conspicuous consumption. How does he afford all that when he's a graffiti artist and a DJ? Well, he tells you he's an "entrepreneur of sorts" because he sells his Adderall perscription to NYU Gallatin chicks, but you suspect he's still living off of his rich dad's money. Typical pseudo employed trust fund baby hijinks, ya know? 

He's really liberal, but is uncomfortable with classifying himself as a "feminist" yet is comfortable enough to *jokingly* ask you to have a threesome with his ex girlfriend who is a manager at All Saints that he's way too congenial with. Oh, and he also haaaates labels and doesn't feel comfortable with you calling him your boyfriend because "labels are so restricting." Did he get that philosophy from Justin Bobby or is he naturally an asshole? Questions, questions. So to get out all of your anger you have against your boytoy, you go to Overthrow. 

We love your aesthetic, but we have to ask, why the fuck are you wearing a leather jacket when it's hot as balls out?

[Photo via @overthrownewyork]