"There are mosquitos, rats, gnats, leeches, agents, and then you have promoters. A promoter is a glorified pimp. But then, everyone's a pimp."

Blackbook's nightlife blogger Steve Lewis offered this unflattering description of promoters in New York Magazine's latest cover story titled "Rachel Uchitel Is Not a Madam". Or, given Lewis's words, is she?

"Lewis will often get texts that say, 'I'll be rolling deep with about a dozen hookers.'"

What other light does this piece shed on the dark underbelly of New York's nightlife? Says "Kim", a former top-tier cocktail waitress (a.k.a. a "bottle girl"), who made "between $1,000 and $3,000 a night in tips", and who chronicles her exploits at a Tumblr called SexDrugsandBottleService,

"And that doesn't include what's going on behind the scenes. You're making hooker money, right? So if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck..."

Oy vey. Thankfully New York Magazine also breaks down the hierarchy of the clubs at which these bottle-girls-cum-hookers latch on to Tiger Woods wannabes - making it easier to avoid (or find) more of the same.

"The current clubs for the rich and famous and those who want to meet them are 1oak, Avenue, Provocateur, and SL. Rose Bar and Boom Boom Room don't do bottle service and are thus considered on the outskirts of its culture, though the latter, with its notoriously tough door policy, is the most exclusive late-night venue in town. Greenhouse, Juliet, Tenjune, and the rest are middle-of-the-road. Former hot spot Marquee is virtually off the radar for the cool crowd."

And to think we've been wasting all this time at Marquee.