Ten Things To Avoid In A Facebook Profile Picture

by Chiara Atik · May 11, 2009

    People have been known to spend hours agonizing over their Facebook profile picture....really shallow people. Still, it's a big decision for anyone, as the profile picture will likely be the first image of you seen by potential employers, potential dates, and all the crazy exes who still stalk you. And now that your Facebook picture comes up on a google search, it's especially important to avoid looking like a jerk. Here are some things avoid when you're choosing a new picture...

    Things To Avoid In A Facebook Profile Picture:

    1. A Headshot/Glamour Shot. You're an ac-TOR. And very little else.

    2. A picture of you as an infant or young child. What happened to you in the last twenty years? And why were there no pictures taken?

    3. A Mirror Self-Portrait. No. Minus points if you're casually looking away from the camera, as if you are completely unaware that you've just done your hair and makeup and you're puckering your lips sexily and your arm is extended and there is a camera in it and a flash just went off.

    4. A picture of you standing next to anyone more attractive than you are. Look, obviously Facebook was designed as a forum for making you look as attractive as humanly possible. Take advantage and crop out the competition.

    5. A picture with any of the following items: solo cup, bong, keg, a baby that is not yours,a mask, five scantily clad members of the opposite sex.

    6. A picture that is not you, or NOT EVEN A PERSON. Seriously. Why is the Lincoln Memorial your Facebook Profile? How ugly are you?

    7. COUPLE PICTURES. Omg, you have a significant other? That's so special. Oh, and you guys kiss?! Wow. That's really cute. Thanks for sharing WITH THE ENTIRE INTERNET.

    8. Drawings/Caricatures. Yeah, it's cute that you went to a Bar Mitzvah/Central Park and had that done. But, it's not 1830. Please upload an actual photograph of yourself for your digital Facebook account.

    9. Obama. Yes, we did it....back in November. I'm sure the President has changed his Facebook profile by now. Why haven't you?

    10. The Facebook Default Picture. If you have this as your Facebook profile, please know that everyone secretly distrusts you and wonders why you have no face. Mob connections? Witness protection program? Plastic surgery gone bad? Too cool to bother with a facebook picture, and therefore has a massive superiority complex?

    Some advice for a GOOD facebook picture: Despite the above list, don't worry about it and don't overthink it. Find a picture in which you're having fun, in which you're smiling and unselfconscious, preferably one that was not taken with "Facebook Profile Pic" as the ultimate objective.The best facebook pictures showcase your actual personality, not some pseudo-personality you're trying to affect. And you've got personality, right? So relax, and get snap-happy!