El Pres from Barstool
David Portnoy has presidential, Bradley Cooper-like hair. He has the fake tan that Trump is trying so hard to achieve. He can't blame the lying media because he IS the media. He called me "fucked in the head" once (that has nothing to do with the topic at hand, it's just a fun fact). He's a millionaire mogul running an empire. Also, "president" is literally in his name.
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